You Think You Know, But You Don’t (Or, My Homage to the MTV Show, “Diary”)

You think you know, but you don’t.

At first, in the way you looked at me, I thought you possibly sort-of knew. I mean, there was a weird knowing glance in your eyes and you sort of looked at me in a cockeyed way, but then when I really dug deep and looked at those piercing eyes it became totally clear to me that although you thought you totally knew, alas, you don’t know a damn thing.

The fact is, I totally know about “you know what” although it’s somewhat misleading to say in quotes “you know what” because in reality you are thinking that the knowledge is yours, locked inside that hard head of yours, but seriously dude, you do not know.

You walk around with this attitude that you so know and that anyone else who comes in contact with you should kiss your feet because you know but when you’re home alone at night and there’s no one to talk to the fact that you don’t know starts eating at you because when it all comes down to brass tax, you really are one of those people who is unhappy and unsatisifed not knowing. Not knowing whether or not you know or don’t know really gets you down.

Well, I’m happy to tell you that what you think, is wrong. (What you thought was that you knew, but in reality you don’t know and so I’m telling you now that you don’t know a damn thing.)

I’m going to tell you right to your face in sort of a mocking annoying way that you think you know, but you don’t. I could be referring to my life. I could be telling you that although you think you know what my life is like and the things I do and the problems I face, that when the world has ended after the sun has crashed into our beloved little ozone-depleted world and we all die a quick and fiery death, that in the end although you thought you knew about me and my life, in reality you knew nothing.

Pre-fiery death, you possibly would have decided that maybe you didn’t know much about my life but instead you were going to stick your neck out and tell people that you think you totally knew about other aspects of me. You might say you knew about the “incident” from a few years back, when deep down you’re really just talking out of your ass. There was no “incident” or scenario that you know about that no one else knows about.

Look. I’m just going to be blunt here and tell it to you honestly. You don’t know. You think you know. But you don’t.

I just hope this will get you to stop trying to know, because knowing you’re constantly attempting to know about what I’m saying you know nothing about starts to grate on my nerves.