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  • Paul Davidson

Today’s Prognosis On Scraped-Nail Polish Syndrome

Your thought process in the matter confuses me.

You’re sitting at home, watching TV, and you look down at your redly-painted nails. Out of boredom or frustration or nervousness or just plain curiosity — you begin to chip away at your nail polish to the point where each and every fingernail has enough red nail polish to fill the center of your nail, but is chipped away around the edges.

It looks swanky.

Then, while you’re still in your sweatpants and tank top, your hair all tied up in one of those scrunchees (oh boy, if there was ever a hair product that sounds like a food item, that is one of them) and you decide, “Hey, why don’t I go out to the drug store at 9 PM at night in my sweatpants and with my hair tied up in a scrunchee and let the entire world see the beautiful hand-picked scraped-nail polished fingertips that I have!”

That would be so cool.

See, here’s the thing. If I was going to pick at my nails (if I used nail polish which I don’t) I would make sure my entire nail was clean and done before venturing out into public where people could see my half-picked nails. Not to mention the fact that it looks bad, it also communicates to me that you can’t get the job done. You start projects and don’t finish them. You have no focus.

People who leave their nail polish half picked on their fingernails are not getting hired in any company I work in!

So, today’s prognosis on scraped-nail polish syndrome is not good. Not good at all. So, if you see someone out there with half-picked nail-polished nails, do us all a favor and stop them and share with them this easy to remember, rhyming phrase:

If it’s not a total peel…you’re gonna make me squeal!

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