Today’s New Scary Holiday: Thursday the 13th
I am officially changing the scary nature of Friday the 13th to Thursday the 13th.
No longer will you have to worry about going out to parties or events on a full-mooned Friday the 13th. No longer will movie studios be able to rope you in on Friday the 13th with movies about freaks killing people on Friday the 13th. No longer will you have to avoid ladders and mirrors and black cats on this day. Because I have offically changed the scary date to Thursday the 13th.
So, for today you must avoid ladders and mirrors and black cats, sure. And before you know it, there will probably be a movie studio who comes out with Thursday the 13th movies. But for now, you can be safe knowing that as long as you can get through the horror of today…
…well, that Friday the 13th is just going to be like any other ordinary “I once was a scary day but now I’m not” day.
And that my friends, are words to grow on.
(Cue NBC “Words to Grow On” theme song here.)