I would just like to take a moment to ban something.
Today, I would like to ban standing ovations in movies. The kind of standing ovations that come at the end of a particularly stressful speech scenario as illustrated in such great standing-ovations-at-the-end-movies like Scent of a Woman, The Girl Next Door, In and Out, Mr. Holland’s Opus, Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure and many many many many many more. (These are scenes within the movie itself where characters get up and perform a standing ovation.)
Nobody takes part in standing ovations in the real world, and if they do it’s because they feel guilty because someone else stood up. Nobody in the right mind wants to stand up at a seated event. They don’t. And so I have chosen to ban standing ovations in movies, for today.
Next week’s ban…unnecessary last minute kissing sequences between two characters that have not met each other throughout the whole movie although the male part of said duo has been obsessed with said co-star through dream sequences throughout the entire film and gets up the courage to just rush towards her and kiss her in the last 10 minutes of the movie.
But that’s next week’s ban, so let’s not get all carried away or anything.
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