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  • Paul Davidson

The Question Game, Part 2

As usual, me and my questions are back.

You may remember the previous incarnation of this game. Well, I’m baaaaaaack with more questions that will test your ability to deal with complicated situations that you will, most likely, never have to face in your real life. That is, unless you’re me. Either way, here we go.

Question #1 You must choose one of the following, which will happen to you.

a. Every time you go to the bathroom, your anus will want to talk to you about the current state of affairs of Germany’s political system.

b. Every time you go to the bathroom, your anus will speak to you in German.

Question #2 Again, choose one.

a. Every night at dinnertime, your phone will ring and you must answer it. The person on the other line is, in actuality, an elderly Mexican man who happens to be a Taco Bell cashier. You must have a ten minute conversation while your family or friends wait for you to come back to the dinner table that is all about whether or not you prefer black beans or pinto beans.

b. You will have to eat black beans or pinto beans (and nothing else) for dinner each night.

Question 3 Choose one, my friends.

a. You will have tourette’s syndrome, but instead of screaming obscenities — you will constantly scream out words that are synonyms for “pudding.”

b. You will have to carry a live chicken around with you in one of those baby bjorns (attached to your chest via a backpack) 24/7.

Question 4 You know what to do.

a. Your fingernails and toenails will fall out, never returning — leaving you with very sensitive and red-puffy finger-ends and toe-ends.

b. Whenever you sneeze, sticky marshmallow creme will come out of your mouth.

In other news — I can’t wait to see your answers on this one. Please explain.

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