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Sad, Sad William Hung

I am feeling extremely sad these days for American Idol rejectee, William Hung.

A quick recap for those living in Antarctica:

William Hung was one of those “really bad auditions” on this seasons American Idol. He sang the song “She-Bangs” and was this awkward looking Asian kid who had a tad bit of trouble enunciating. He will go down in American Idol history (if there was such a thing as history based on a very mediocre re-creation of the television show Star Search but with mean-spirited judges) as the kid who stood up to the judges and said something to the effect of:

“I did my best, and that’s all that matters.”

Then, of course, the money-grubbing people over at FOX decided that since all anyone watches American Idol for anyway, is to see the horrible singers in their horrible auditions (because deep down we all suck at singing and it makes us feel better) so why not bring back the worst of the singers and do a special SPECIAL about that? And while we’re at it, bring back William Hung, too.

Drag that UC Berkeley student from Northern California and let him sing his horrible rendition of the song ONE MORE TIME.

Then, while this is going on, why doesn’t everyone over at the Fuse Music Network, a wannabe MTV-like channel, sit down and wonder how they can possibly make any money on this Asian train wreck… And what do you guess…they do.

So the President of Fuse TV shows up at some UC Berkeley basketball game, where the University has already found a way to squeeze the William Hung rock for a little more attention on night-time news magazine shows by having him dance with some pretty cheerleaders during the half-time basketball show… And while he’s there, the President of Fuse TV offers William Hung a moderate check for enough money to, you guessed it..

Record His Own Album

There is even a Press Release about it.

General Manager and Executive Vice President of KOCH Records Alan Grunblatt states “William is the perfect artist for our culturally diverse society. He is the new Elvis!”

“Fuse is thrilled that the network’s first exclusive music video will be for William Hung’s ‘She Bangs’ single,” states Marc Juris, President of FUSE. “He may not be the next American Idol, but he is definitely a star and inspiration to everyone who sings in the shower. Fuse sees itself in William – except he dances better.

William Hung has been on the Today Show, shown on nighttime magazines recording his video for “She-Bangs” for Fuse… Mere mention of him caused smirking on The Today Show, where he’s supposed to be “performing” later this week. Just watching Matt and Katie try to keep a straight face made me wince.

Interviews with William Hung have him saying things like, “The music business is a tough business to be in, but with all this help and support I believe I can make it. I have well out experienced my 15 minutes of fame…” (That is WAY paraphrased.)

The thing is — people are making fun of William Hung all over the place and I half believe he’s buying into the propaganda that is being force-fed to him and the rest of the American citizens who are sitting on the net and watching television and laughing at this horrible singer. The guy with no rhythm but a bevy of attractive dancers rubbing up against him as he sings his songs.

If you have the iTunes music store, you may want to listen to the pre-release tracks from his NEW ALBUM, which includes the worst, most off-tune rendition of Elton John’s “Rocket Man” and R. Kelly’s “I Believe I Can Fly”.

I am sad for William Hung. And for god sake…I wish he would wake up and realize that he is a huge joke that no one expects to last longer than the Fall.

Seriously, I am sad. No crying, mind you, but really really sad for the guy.

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