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  • Paul Davidson

I Have A Warm Hat

I have a warm hat.

This morning I got out of bed, went into my closet, took out my ghetto-skater wool skull cap and pulled it down over my head and I was in heaven.

But having such a warm hat has started to make me wonder if this hat is warm because it was made to be warm or because it is the only skull-cap wool hat I have ever worn and I do not know any different. Are there other warm skull-cap hats out there that are warmer? Am I living a false life thinking that my warm hat is the warmest hat out there?

If a tree falls in the forest and no one is there to hear it, does it make a sound?

If there are other warm hats out there but I never have a chance to wear one, is my hat the warmest in the world?

Two questions. Two concepts. Two very serious situations. For if I were to one day be visiting Alaska, having taken a day trip off a cruise and went ashore after forgetting my awesome warm hat, and the wind started whipping at my head and I had no other choice but to buy a new hat and it was warmer than my favorite wool skull cap and I put it on and my skull was warmer than it had ever been in the entire history of my hat-wearing life, well…

I would be devastated.

And so, I prefer to claim that my hat is the warmest hat and any hat you have may be warm enough for your hat but not warm enough for me.

And I feel good about that.

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