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  • Paul Davidson

I Could Be Your 1.5% Loved Best Humor Blog

There are people like Tom Cruise and there are people like Carrot Top.

The world needs people like Tom Cruise, who is at the apex of his game — at the top of the world making millions of dollars and being hailed as the best of the best. And then there’s Carrot Top. Without whom, we would never have been blessed with a string of high-quality 1-800-ATT commercials.

Today, I am Carrot Top.

The 2004 Weblog Awards are still going on — you can vote here every 24 hours. I was nominated for the Best Humor Blog category and was in the lead for about, oh I don’t know, 2 hours. And now, I’m scraping for 1.5% of the vote.

And you know what? I am TOTALLY cool with that.

Know this: It was just an honor to be nominated. Everyone on that list is a great writer. My family loves me. I am an important person in this world no matter what over 10,000 people think of me and my writing. I am loved. I have two feet, two arms, two legs, one eye (and one glass eye) and nineteen toes (one got eaten up in a tragic escalator accident. If I end up with 1.5% of the vote, leaving me a few spots from the bottom — I would be fine with that.

Come to think of it — I would be fine at the BOTTOM. The last person in line. Because when push comes to shove, I have other talents. I can steal stuff from your mini-bar without you knowing. I can fashion weapons out of rubberbands and have fun while doing it.

So vote for me! Words For My Enjoyment — as your 1.5% or lower choice for Best Humor Blog!

You’ll be glad you did.

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