So I stood there. Waiting for my roast beef sandwich to be prepared by the clerk behind the counter.
And you stood over there. Ovah there, behind the bread bowls and dehydrated pineapple rings. Talking to someone you’d known for years. Telling them that tomorrow night when the kids went to sleep you’d be breaking out those kick-ass cornish game hens. You described them with such drippy adjectives, that I just had to say, “sounds good.”
But apparently you don’t care that I am interested in your cornish game hens.
Today I would like to officially ban a list of things that must be removed from the world immediately. They include:
Thank you for your time.
You know me.
I never plug anything, which must mean that when I do plug something it’s either because (a) someone is paying me to do so, (b) the voices told me to do so, or (c) the voices are telling me if I plug something someone is bound to pay me.
So without further adieu I ask you wholeheartedly to check out Travels with Two — a travel blog written by my close friend/voice/payroll coordinator. If you like the blog, vote for it here. If you don’t, then may Doc Hudson have mercy on your soul.
Yes. I have kids now. Cars informs everything I do now.
I try to be courteous and listen to my friends and colleagues when they talk to me.
I try to nod and look interested, periodically adding a “Mmmhmm” or a “Oh yeah” or a “No way” all the while they flap their lips, telling me about their nightmares or their car issues or the fact that the water heater in their house burst over the weekend. I try to seem engaged because that’s what a friend or colleague does when their other friend or colleage reaches out and asks to share their latest tale.
But if you’re going to talk to me about how many glasses of water you drank today..? I’m going to opt out.
Words for My Enjoyment is the official blog of writer Paul Davidson. He lives in Los Angeles where, well, the magic happens.
