There was a post here and now it’s gone.
In its place I now put a post that replaces the previous post which mentioned things related to criminals who double as real estate agents and my thoughts on the most recent movie starring some very well known SNL alums. I also had some great punctuation and a bunch of periods and commas.
Some of my passages that were here before were in italics, as well.
The post that was here and now is gone was here for a few hours. There were people across the world who had the opportunity to read the post that was once here and it may have changed their lives for the better. In fact, how ironic would it be to know that someone out there had read the post that was here and now is gone and it sparked a chain-reaction of events that will one day secure them the office of the President of the United States.
How fitting that the inspiration for our future President was only in existence for a split second. How ironic that it inspired and drove someone to change their own life? How strange that there is no record of it anywhere?
Trust me when I tell you that I have never done this before. But as I sat at breakfast this morning there was a nagging at my soul. A feeling that what was posted here and now is gone was not good or funny or interesting at all. That I was “phoning it in.”
And so, I acted quickly, like a surgical strike on an evil Middle Eastern outpost. I swooped in, removed the existence of the post that was once here and now is gone, and in its place gave you this. A rant in the truest sense of the word. But even now I am worrying. For what if two hours from now I worry that this rant is not funny or interesting or creative. Then and only then would you be faced with the new post, “There Was A Rant, Replacing A Post That Was Here And Now Is Gone, Which I’m Now Replacing With This Haiku.”
It could happen. You know it could.
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