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  • Paul Davidson

Edward Norton Wants His Car

Edward Norton may not be the nice guy you think he is.

I was standing out near the Valet station waiting for my car after an UNDISCLOSED PARTY which I will not mention here for fear of being accosted by the Edward Norton People, who have no names but will come after you if they can figure out who you are after saying that Edward Norton may not be the nice guy you think he is.

Edward Norton was with his publicist, assistant and another non-descript person. But even with the fan base, he was grumbling away.

Edward Norton: Where’s my car?

Publicist: It’s coming. We gave them your ticket.

Edward Norton looks to me.

Edward Norton: They took his ticket first. He’s going to get his car before us.

Publicist: They’re getting your car. It’s coming.

Edward Norton has now decided to raise his voice.

Edward Norton: We should have brought two cars. One to arrive in, and one that would be ready for me as soon as I was ready to leave. If we have to have three or four cars come with us to make sure there’s one ready when I am, then do it.

The Edward Norton People nod, submissively as my car arrives. I get inside. Looking back, Edward Norton isn’t pleased that the regular old non-descript Pauly D is leaving before him. He mouths something to his publicist which was either:

Edward Norton: He got his car first. Edward Norton: I’m about to burst. Edward Norton: He looks like Stephen Furst.

I don’t know if Edward Norton ever got his car, but since I have seen him places other than the Valet station since then — I suspect he did.

In other news, Stephen Furst starred in Animal House and that classic scavenger hunt movie, Midnight Madness.

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