So we know I’m caucasian.
You’ve had a tough week.
Trust me when I tell you I know that you have. All that work and all that drama and all the politics swirling around you at your job? It’s enough to drive you crazy, let alone enough to keep you from doing the one thing that’s most important to you: keeping in shape.
That’s why, it’s nice to know that some uncontrollable laughter here on Friday is the equivalent of ordering one of those stomach-electrode six-pack makers, which…in the end probably doesn’t do much more than fry the hair off your chest (if you have any, that is).
But ironically, today’s edition of “Words For Your Enjoyment” is about just that…fitness.
This morning at the gym I was doing my thang on an elliptical machine when the girl next to me got down and in the process accidentally snapped me with her towel. I wasn’t going to let it stand.
Me: You just hit me with your towel.
Her: Oh!? I’m sorry!
Me: It hurt.
Her: Oh. I’m totally sorry about that!
At this point, she began to get her things together, preparing to leave.
Me: Where are you going?
Her: I’m leaving.
Me: You can’t just leave. That’s like leaving the scene of a hit and run accident.
Her: What the hell are you talking about!?
Me: You. Hit. Me. With. Your. Towel.
Once again the twilight blackens the night sky and the sun rises above the gorgeous vistas from sea to shining sea, and throughout it all there is one very serious constant — “Words For Your Enjoyment”.
This week’s gem of an idea comes all the way from James G. who says, “It’s been awhile since you’ve talked about celebrities like our ‘ol boy Scottie Baio — have you run into anyone else lately?”
Color me surprised.
Would you believe, that just yesterday I came in contact with a man that some may say is the greatest celebrity on the face of the Earth? The greatest celebrity since the dawn of time? A mere giant among others like Moses, Alexander the Great (non Colin Farrell version), Joan of Arc, Abraham Lincoln, ALF, and so many more. That man’s name?
I work out.
Let me just put that out there so you can think about it for a moment. Yes, I get up early on a daily basis and I go to the gym and I work out and pump iron and often yelp when I bang my right knee into a variety of metal objects. My right knee loves to smash itself against such things. In fact, it’s my bad knee now, due to such activities. But I work out. And you must accept that before I may continue.