No Matter What I Do, I Can’t Dream About Whitney Houston

Have you ever read those books?

You know, the ones that tell you how to cope with your daily stresses by giving yourself “suggestions” before you go to bed so that while you’re sleeping you can have your mind suss out all your problems by dreaming about said problems and handling said problems entirely in the dream world? It’s a part of those same books that also instruct writers how to solve narrative problems in their current writing, just by suggesting they want to dream about them. Even for fun, it seems, people can tell themselves they’d like to dream about winning American Idol and voila — they can.

Except no matter what I do, I can’t dream about Whitney Houston.