What People Are Saying About Spiderman 3

Guy #1: “I’ll see Spiderman 3.”
Guy #2: “But I thought you vowed not to see it.”
Guy #1: “I changed my mind.”
Guy #2: “Why?”
Guy #1: “This one’s got a black Spiderman.”

## ## ##

Girl #1: “Tobey Maguire looks like an elf.”
Girl #2: “And Kirsten Dunst — please girl, fix those teeth already.”
Girl #1: “And that guy from Sideways is the villain?”
Girl #2: “Ugh.”
Girl #1: “We’re going Friday.”
Girl #2: “Yeah, us too!”

## ## ##

Guy #1: “They say Spiderman 3 is going to make a bucket of money this weekend.”
Guy #2: “Oh yeah?”
Guy #1: “Yeah. And that 4 out of 5 moviegoers have expressed interest in seeing that movie.”
Guy #2: “Well, what else is opening in theaters?”
Guy #1: “Um, that Drew Barrymore movie where she meets some guy at a casino.”
Guy #2: “And it’s still only 4 out of 5?”

Today’s Rumors About Celebrities

Living in Hollywood is a unique experience.

Because everyone you know happens to know a celebrity. Everyone who knows a celebrity happens to know something about said celebrity. And everything that everyone knows about those certain celebrities may or may not be entirely true. That’s why they’re called rumors.

And that’s why they’re so amusing to read about.

Kirsten Dunst Needs A Good Orthodontist

Saw Spiderman 2 last night.

I will give you no spoilers. I will not ruin the plot. I will not describe sequences involving actors and will not tell you about the cameos. I will not spoil the jokes and I will not tell you about the CGI action sequences. And I will definitely not tell you about the end.

But I will tell you this: Kirsten Dunst needs a damn good orthodontist.

Dr. Crabtree (real name) was my orthodontist while I was growing up in the San Francisco area. He was a genial man with a talent for making petty conversation with you while he tightened the metal braces around your teeth, took cement impressions of your teeth, jammed plastic spacers between your teeth to ready them for braces and as all of it was going on — he came off as the most genuine man around.