The Fast Food Tides Are Changing

[At the drive-thru]

Me: “Cheeseburger meal please.”
Them: “Do you want a salad with that?”
Me: “A salad? No thanks.”
Them: “It’ll balance out the meal, no?”
Me: “No thanks. Just the cheeseburger meal.”
Them: “The salads are really good, much better than before.”
Me: “It’s too much food.”
Them: “Then, just the salad?”
Me: “Cheese. Burgers. Fries. Coke. Thanks.”
Them: “How about a water?”

WFME’s Nobody Is Listening, Part Threux

“Welcome to McDonald’s, may I take your order?”
“Yeah, I’ll have two cheeseburgers, a diet coke and an apple pie.”

“That’s a cheeseburger, a coke and a fish pie?”
“What’s a fish pie?”

“I’m sorry, sir — I meant a Filet o’ Fish. Would you like anything else?”
“Um, how about NOT a fish pie.”

“One second, sir — let me delete that.”
“Thanks.”

“So, that’s a cheeseburger and a coke.”
“No. That’s incorrect. I wanted TWO cheeseburgers, a diet coke and an APPLE pie.”

“Two cheeseburgers, diet coke and a small fry.”
“Almost — I don’t want fries.”

“No fries? Okay.”
“But I want an APPLE PIE.”

“An apple pie?”
“Yes. Exactly.”

“So that’s two cheeseburgers and an apple pie.”
“You forgot the diet coke.”

“SIR, there’s no need to be rude. I didn’t forget the diet coke, I just already said it a million times that I wasn’t going to waste my time saying it again.”
“Oh.”

“Please pull around to the first window.”