When Gas Station Attendant Conversations Are Almost As Confusing As ABC’s Lost

Me: “Twenty bucks on pump seven.”
Him: “Pump seven?”
Me: “Yes. Pump seven.”
Him: “Maybe you should use pump eight instead.”
Me: “Is pump seven broken?”
Him: “You can just pull your car up a little bit and it will reach.”
Me: “Is there something wrong with pump seven?”
Him: “So that’s twenty on eight?”
Me: “Unless I can use pump seven.”
Him: “You could use nine.”
Me: “Fine, I’ll use seven. Can I go pump the gas now?”
Him: “Your destiny is in your own hands…not mine.”

The only thing I didn’t see was that damn smoke monster.

I Think My Checker Is Up To Something

We all interact with checkers.

No, not the plastic pieces from the famous game. No, not the people who check to see if you’re home and if you’re not they use a rubberband to tie a flyer on your door-handle. I’m talking about the people who “check you out” at your local Supermarket, electronics store, pharmacy and what not. The conversations you have with the people scanning your credit cards, taking your money and giving you change.

But what happens when those conversations start to seem ominous?