Comments on: Today’s Prognosis on Rude Doctor-In-The-House Restaurant Yellers

By: Jen&HerBoat

Jen&HerBoat — Sat, 24 Mar 2007 18:29:29 +0000

While I was in the ER with my dad a couple weeks ago there was quite an interesting (read: derelict and extremely high) man in the corner regaling everyone with his life stories, whether they wanted to hear them or not.

He, apparantly, gave someone the classic bic pen casing in the throat so they can breathe maneuver.

And I wonder, did the ‘patient’ okay that? Would I have okay’ed it? I mean, at that point, I think I might choose slow suffocation. Bleurgh.

By: kartooner

kartooner — Sat, 24 Mar 2007 15:25:25 +0000

I’ve done this a couple times in a Sizzler, does that still count?

By: Pauly D

Pauly D — Fri, 23 Mar 2007 17:30:56 +0000

Amy - Just for your information, I never gave birth to anything in a bathroom at the prom. (Not sure if you were referring to me or not.)

By: Amy

Amy — Fri, 23 Mar 2007 02:23:35 +0000

I can’t imagine wanting to give birth in a filthy elevator. Just think of all the dirty fingers that touched those buttons.

It’s just as bad as someone giving birth in a bathroom at the prom.

Ugh.

By: celebrapauly's foundation

celebrapauly's foundation — Fri, 23 Mar 2007 00:03:46 +0000

yes, it’s true, there are only two kinds of people in the world

Hutu and Tutsi

Which do you prefer?
I’ll be the other

stripes or solids?

You know, if even we can’t find some small place of common ground

than I’m sad for the world….for myself and for you

I am

By: Wordmaven

Wordmaven — Thu, 22 Mar 2007 20:37:39 +0000

Funny using the word Prognosis in this post. One nano-second after calling 911, I am yelling (demurely) to the waiter to pack my yummy, expensive meal “to go”. I don’t get out much.
AND Pauly, any human who “wants” to deliver a baby in an elevator (or other public conveyance) is INSANE or utterly ignorant of the disgusting BACTERIA on every surface.

By: Steve KH

Steve KH — Thu, 22 Mar 2007 20:11:17 +0000

This could become extremely lethal if Doctor-in-the-house Yeller was the intoxicated one. The Yeller, with aid from the double scotches, would have enough confidence to diagnose the fallen victim and then not even wait for a response to his doctor-in-the-house cry. The drunken Yeller would have already misdiagnosed the victim with a blood clot and begun surgery with a pen before a real doctor even had time to THINK that the Yeller was rude for interrupting his meal. I’m no longer going to nice restaurants for fear of being opened up by a drunk doctor yeller.

By: James Cooper

James Cooper — Thu, 22 Mar 2007 20:00:32 +0000

While playing the trivia game at Fridays one day I was presented with the information that being inebriated would not significantly affect a doctor’s ability to perform surgery. Now, granted, even with this alleged fact I still would prefer a sober surgeon, in a pinch an intoxicated doc ought to work just fine.

The problem I see though, is what if I called for a doctor and some drunkard who is not a doctor claimed to be one and then proceeded to “operate” on the patient. That would likely not go well.

By: Pauly D

Pauly D — Thu, 22 Mar 2007 18:05:29 +0000

Steve - You’re so right about that. The yeller always makes their own amateurish diagnosis before looking for a doctor. I find it’s usually a stroke, choking on a piece of food or a blood clot.

By: Steve KH

Steve KH — Thu, 22 Mar 2007 17:46:57 +0000

My favorite part of the “Doctor-in-the-house” Yeller is the part where they try and diagnose the medical condition THEN yell “Is there a doctor in the house?!”

For example, your aunt Marge collapses to the floor and as Marge is still on her way down, your cousin Frank instantly yells out “I think she’s having a stroke! Is there a doctor in the house?!” This person not only likes to hear their own voice, but they like to pretend that they COULD perform the pen surgury if need be. However, to save face and pretend to be courteous they first yell throughout the entire classy restaurant to give all of the drunk surgeons first crack at a MacGyver-like surgery. Deep down they’re praying that a semi-sober surgeon steps forward to diagnose Marge so they can go on yelling without having to back up their false knowledge in strokes. These type of people have got to go…