Comments on: I’m Done Opening Doors

By: Darlene

Darlene — Mon, 30 Oct 2006 22:34:10 +0000

I think I meant to say blokes are bad at giving seats to ladies and pregnant women. Excuse my lack of eloquence.

I wouldn’t diss pregnant women, the heifers.

By: Darlene

Darlene — Mon, 30 Oct 2006 22:32:41 +0000

Gee, I’ve just just discovered this blog and now I find out that its author wouldn’t open the door for me. Oh the shock, the horror.

Cinekat is right though.

I can also say the worse offenders for not opening doors or giving a seat to a “lady” (whatever a lady is) are blokes or a pregnant woman. Horrible!!!

Here you go, Paul, hit the link here (and possibly here).

http://thespinzine.squarespace.com/journal/2006/10...

By: cinekat

cinekat — Mon, 30 Oct 2006 14:03:21 +0000

I know how you feel - I was raised to give my seat to the elderly/handicapped/pregnant passengers getting on the bus/tram/subway, and always do so. However, every once in a while there’s some lady who isn’t pregnant or doesn’t deem herself elderly … and man, they can get nasty.

By: littlepurplecow

littlepurplecow — Mon, 30 Oct 2006 05:07:39 +0000

Consider pulling out chairs. I find that this act of chivalry is less common and therefore more impactful. It’s tough to ignore someone with the power to send you to the floor.

By: Arnold Villeneuve

Arnold Villeneuve — Mon, 30 Oct 2006 04:10:35 +0000

I agree with you 110%. If I did not open a door for a child, lady, women, elderly person, or even another guy needing a hand because his hands were full my Mom would smack me and rightfully so. However, I really get peeved when you go through the trouble and the person you just helped does not even say thank you.

I’ve taken a different approach and a very up front one than you have. I’m not going to let peoples rudeness stop me from doing a good thing. Instead, I’ve decided to be direct and confrontational. When I open a door for a lady, or anyone for that matter, and she/he does not say thank you, I point out to them in a very direct way that it is polite to say thank you when someone opens or holds the door for you. And man, does that approach take people back, especially if there are other people around that noticed the rudeness as well.

It’s a kind of direct pay it forward corrective attitude adjustment approach.

By: Jody

Jody — Sun, 29 Oct 2006 22:04:33 +0000

Pauly, I always, always say thank you to any man, woman or child that holds a door open for me. Always! Maybe it’s because I was raised with manners and still use them. By the way, I stopped taking carry on baggage because I could never get anyone to help me put my luggage in the overhead bin. While my bag may be heavy for me, every man that has ever lifted it has told me it wasn’t heavy at all. Nonetheless, men would see me struggling to get my bag in the overhead bin and sit there dumbfounded. Again, if anyone every helped me they got a thank you at the time of help and then a thank you when I deplaned. I’m just that way.

Don’t give up. There are people out there that are appreciative. Besides if they don’t say thank you, then say it aloud to yourself so they can hear and then follow up with a your welcome. Perhaps you will get through their thick skulls and make them feel guilty.

Excuse me is another term people seem to have forgotten also.

By: Gina

Gina — Sun, 29 Oct 2006 22:02:33 +0000

I think you’re lying. I think a man who has been so nice his whole life doesn’t just stop. I believe you, and everyone else who is frustrated with the no-thank yous of life, will go on still being nice. And will also probably be known as “that guy” who did something nice for someone without being thanked. But someone will remember you for what you did, even if they never said thanks. I’m a teacher–think there’s loads of “thanks” in that profession?! But when one of my kids, or a parent, says “thanks” to me, I know it means something.

By: Merel

Merel — Sun, 29 Oct 2006 19:51:51 +0000

I would have said thank you if you had opened a door for me!

By: Janet

Janet — Sun, 29 Oct 2006 15:38:37 +0000

Then again, you do live in Los Angelos.

I’m just saying.

By: Safiyyah

Safiyyah — Sun, 29 Oct 2006 09:33:10 +0000

Opening doors matters more to most women than you might think. A random girl might give you a second look, but those little things make all the difference to a girlfriend or wife. Of course, if you’re opening doors and participating in all of the outward niceties without being kind and generous in privacy, you’re making a pretty shoddy impression on the woman you’re trying to please.