WFME’s Nobody Is Listening, Part Threux
October 23rd, 2006
“Welcome to McDonald’s, may I take your order?”
“Yeah, I’ll have two cheeseburgers, a diet coke and an apple pie.”
“That’s a cheeseburger, a coke and a fish pie?”
“What’s a fish pie?”
“I’m sorry, sir — I meant a Filet o’ Fish. Would you like anything else?”
“Um, how about NOT a fish pie.”
“One second, sir — let me delete that.”
“Thanks.”
“So, that’s a cheeseburger and a coke.”
“No. That’s incorrect. I wanted TWO cheeseburgers, a diet coke and an APPLE pie.”
“Two cheeseburgers, diet coke and a small fry.”
“Almost — I don’t want fries.”
“No fries? Okay.”
“But I want an APPLE PIE.”
“An apple pie?”
“Yes. Exactly.”
“So that’s two cheeseburgers and an apple pie.”
“You forgot the diet coke.”
“SIR, there’s no need to be rude. I didn’t forget the diet coke, I just already said it a million times that I wasn’t going to waste my time saying it again.”
“Oh.”
“Please pull around to the first window.”
mmmm… fish pie. Extra mayo on that.
I gotta make a run to McD’s…
Comment by The Centaur — October 23, 2006 @ 9:19 am
Most people don’t know you can CUSTOMIZE your McDonalds experience. So, yes, ask for the Fish Pie. Tell them you saw it on WFME. That’s enough street cred enough to get you the free Super Size upgrade as well.
Comment by monkeyinabox — October 23, 2006 @ 10:37 am
How could you eat at McD’s? Drive-thru no less? He was already confused with the diet coke since that part of the order didn’t make sense with the CHEESEBURGERS AND (FRIED) APPLE PIE. Reminds me of ordering Tab Floats (yes they still make Tab!)
Comment by Jody — October 23, 2006 @ 11:04 am
Monkey - The thing is, I’m so used to ordering things NOT on the menu (In n’ Out’s Monster Style Burger or Coffee Bean’s Sunrise) that it wouldn’t surprise me if you COULD order a fish pie.
Jody - Good point.
Comment by Pauly D — October 23, 2006 @ 11:12 am
I’m kinda scared to eat the food after an infuriating exchange like that, especially at the drive-threux when you cannot see the guy the whole time. Then again, I’m always kinda scared to eat at McD.
Comment by susan — October 23, 2006 @ 11:29 am
Hey, at least the drive-thru employee spoke English. Near my home all the McD employees only speak spanish or have such thick accents you can’t understand what they are saying when they are standing in front of you, let alone when filtered through those fabulous speakers. I have just taught my children to regard ordering at McDonald’s an “adventure”. You never know what you will get!
Comment by Michelle — October 23, 2006 @ 12:58 pm
I’m so old that when I was a kid, McDonald’s still found it mathematical possible and still bothered to keep a running tally of hamburgers sold, posted on all their signage.
Must have been somewhere in the tawdry millions.
I remember long before Colonel Saunders ever dreamed or dared to be “funky” when nobody as yet had so much as heard of falafel or Thai….
And Sushi? Treasonable, unthinkable
Back then, Mexican and Chinese were considered “ethnic” food.
Now, I think of all these foods as practically American as anything else except for maybe American cheese.
American Cheese?
Who is responsible for that national policy fiasco anyway?
I mean of all the unpatriotic and disposable cheeses to represent the virtuous idealism, the terrible power (and its management), the purple robe of majesty and spectacle of glory that this great nation might have been ……
On second thought…… seems appropriate
Comment by Daniel — October 23, 2006 @ 4:54 pm
reminds me of the time i went to taco bell and ordered a “10 pack of tacos” and when i got home i opened a bag full of “ten choco tacos.”
Comment by jadepark — October 23, 2006 @ 5:32 pm
Jade - Yes, but everyone knows you LOVE choco tacos.
Comment by Pauly D — October 23, 2006 @ 5:51 pm
Apparently they caught onto my secret passion for choco tacos!
(”No, she doesn’t really want a 10 pack of tacos–she wants CHOCO TACOS!)
Comment by jadepark — October 23, 2006 @ 5:52 pm
I rarely go through the drive-thru anymore. Try ordering a Chalupa at Taco Bell and explain that you want rice instead of beef… the horror.
Comment by Dave2 — October 23, 2006 @ 6:12 pm
Since I have left the US to live in Brazil, I have completely abandoned fast food. While food here is generally SO much better than food in the US (fresher, less processed) I’m not going to lie when there are times when I daydream about a McDonald’s hamburger. A Quarter Pounder with cheese. My god, it would be a personal heaven. Yo, the lack of fast food has done wonders for the waistline, but my god….please…just…one…bite…please…por favor.
Comment by Gina — October 23, 2006 @ 6:28 pm
“Abandon hope all ye who eat here”
Taco Bell?
That’s so waaaaay declasse
Oh… how the mighty have fallen
Comment by Daniel — October 23, 2006 @ 7:32 pm
Wow!!!!
Comment by cutiepie — October 24, 2006 @ 3:56 am
note to Paul: don’t ever eat at McDonalds
Comment by Jacquie — October 24, 2006 @ 5:37 am