Mr. Six Revealed!
February 1st, 2006
Some mysteries are never solved.
Like Stonehenge, Roswell and Jimmy Hoffa. Like Oak Island, the assassination of JFK, and what the monster is on the island in Lost. From the Bermuda Triangle, Jack the Ripper and thousands more cases — the world is filled with unsolved and un-proven mysteries that continue to inspire exploration, investigation and introspection.
Today, we have one less mystery to solve.
You may or may not remember that I had previously been on a search for Mr. Six, the Six Flags Magic Mountain iconic commercial character who danced his way into all of our hearts via the Venga Boys tunes. Yet, no matter how close I thought I had come to solving the mystery, the old-time dancing fool eluded me…and the Six Flags Corporation refused to fess up to his true identity.
It was a mystery that many tried to solve but one that none were successful at.
Searches for “Mr. Six” plagued online search engines. Discussion overloaded internet chat rooms. People ended up at this blog location (WFME) as one stop on a long journey to discover once and for all who the man “behind the prosthetic old-guy face and dark glasses” actually was. The media asked Six Flags, but were turned away. Well-known advertising magazines dug deeper. Individuals like myself peered into the darkness for answers.
And still there were no answers.
Six Flags remained stone-faced, unwilling to reveal who Mr. Six was…and as of November 2005 when Mr. Six’s popularity was at its height — Six Flags decided it was time to end the ad campaign due to the fact that the new owner (Washington Redskins owner Dan Snyder) felt the wildly-successful character skewed too young.
Mr. Six was over. He was done. But was he gone?
Yet still — the mystery remained. Who was Mr. Six? Where did he go? Was he a performer or a dancer, was he a well known actor or an unknown whom we would soon come to be introduced to? Much like the Zapruder film, would some piece of evidence emerge to prove once and for all the true identity of Mr. Six?
Yes. Yes it would.
Although I cannot reveal my sources currently (although if put in jail and forced to release them I may give them up since I like homemade meals too much to miss out on them), I can reveal to you once and for all that it has been confirmed that the official, true identity of one Mr. Six is none other than:
Queer Eye for the Straight Girl’s Danny Teeson
The gal-pal from the Bravo TV spin-off show is a native of England who “learned first hand about food and wine at the feet of his grandmother, who taught him how to cook at the age of five.” Teeson was a member of the original London cast of “Fame the Musical” where he was dance captain and understudy to Tyrone Jackson and Joe Vegas. “After several years of performing in various productions, Teeson moved from theatre into commercial dance, where he danced and choreographed for artists such as Kylie Minogue, Geri Halliwell, Diana Ross, Gloria Estefan, Usher, Mya and Tom Jones, with whom he won 2000’s best music video for “Sex Bomb.” Eventually, he began to coach artists on body language, stage presence, inner confidence, social know-how, and basically, how to be a star.”
Although names have been protected to keep them safe from Six Flags’ wrath — the confirmation came to WFME just recently when a source who had worked with individuals that had helped film the Six Flags commercials let the identity of Mr. Six (assuming it was OK since the campaign was now over) slip. Six Flags, of course, still has no comment — and continues to deny the true identity even now that the floodgates are poised to open. But now that the truth is out, Six Flags is going to have to finally fess up to one of advertising’s biggest questions.
Here at WFME, this is a true journalistic scoop as this information has yet to be revealed anywhere else…this is the first time and mention of Mr. Danny Teeson as “Mr. Six” — and although we haven’t specifically spoken to Danny yet, we suspect that today’s stunning revelation will be confirmed and passed along to major media outlets in the coming days.
Yes, the mystery has been solved.
As for Danny Teeson, we salute you and your old guy dancing fake prosthetic know-how, and thank you for finally allowing us to put this Sphinx-like riddle to rest.
Long live, Mr. Six.
(Update: Even more evidence has surfaced confirming this 100%.)
I’ll sleep better tonight, for sure. Where would I be without you and your mad Sphinx-like-riddle-solving skillz?
Comment by annabel lee — February 1, 2006 @ 6:23 am
Paul, we don’ t have a six flags here. Only a Cedar Point and CP has no old guys dancing in their promotions. Only Snoopy. Why Snoopy??? I have no idea.
What I really want to know is, who first discovered that popcorn pops?
Comment by Jacquie — February 1, 2006 @ 6:23 am
I was hoping I wouldn’t see that guy again until next summer.
Comment by Mark K — February 1, 2006 @ 6:38 am
That guy is about as creepy as the talking baby on the Quiznos commercials!
Comment by Alissa — February 1, 2006 @ 6:48 am
That guy freaks me out. Every time he comes on TV, my wife demands that I either mute or change the channel so she can try to deny his existence. She gets the willies. I’m not much better.
Comment by Kevin — February 1, 2006 @ 6:57 am
Oh great, I was telling everyone within earshot that it was a woman in disguise. And then I would give them a meaningful look. And then I would dance my way, (sort of) out of the room. I think I had about 1.5 people convinced it was ME. Okay the 1 was me and I’m probably imagining the .5. Why does the truth hurt so MUCH?
Comment by susan — February 1, 2006 @ 7:01 am
I’ve never seen these commercials.
BUT, I clicked on your link to see the first article you wrote about Mr. Six. And while I was there, clicked on the link you provided for Adam Hooker…the aristoi site? And I watched episode 7 of the cartoon he is featuring…
Between that big bowl of weirdness and this dancing fellow you seem to be obsessed with, I’m worried. What kind of individuals are you associating with, Pauly?
Friends, it may be time for an intervention…
Comment by Flower Girl — February 1, 2006 @ 7:03 am
Susan - Sorry I ruined your ruse. But this looks to be the real deal.
Flower Girl - When you click on links to leave this site, I have no control over the content. You surf at your own risk.
Comment by Pauly D — February 1, 2006 @ 7:04 am
If I didn’t know Dan Snyder was 6 feet tall I’d say he had little man syndrome. Maybe he’s just small. His urges to screw with his team is one thing…but getting rid of Mr. Six…ugh! Scews to young? Hmmmmm?
Ok..It’s little man syndrome of some sort…I’m convinced.
I wonder what you’d look like all prosthetic’d up…? Cuddly and old, I’m sure. Hmm just a thought.
xoxo C
Comment by Thoughtsgalore — February 1, 2006 @ 7:25 am
So, basically, you just outed Mr. Six??
Comment by Dave2 — February 1, 2006 @ 7:28 am
Basically.
Comment by Pauly D — February 1, 2006 @ 7:29 am
Danny Teeson? All this time I thought it was Uncle Junior from the Sopranos. Damn.
Comment by Jerry — February 1, 2006 @ 7:49 am
“When you click on links to leave this site, I have no control over the content. You surf at your own risk.”
This is exactly the kind of comment I’d expect from someone in a crisis…someone in need of an intervention. Always wanting to lay the blame elsewhere, when the real responsibility lies within you…
Comment by Flower Girl — February 1, 2006 @ 7:53 am
Flower Girl - I’m going out for a drink. Don’t follow me. I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU.
Comment by Pauly D — February 1, 2006 @ 7:54 am
I too am freaked out by Mr. Six. I have to turn the channel or close my eyes and mute the t.v. He creeps me out. I’m also slightly freaked out by Nikki Sixx, but that’s a whole other story.
Comment by Amber — February 1, 2006 @ 8:07 am
I just read [i]screws[/i] too young instead of what was actually written.
Six Flags screws too young. Who knew?
Comment by the swede — February 1, 2006 @ 8:35 am
It looks like we’re going to need the restraints for this one…
Comment by Flower Girl — February 1, 2006 @ 8:35 am
Oh Pauly Pauly please fix the fact that I used [] instead of . PLEASE! I thought I was still on a messageboard somewhere…
And then, delete this “comment”.
Or, you can of course do whatever you please since this is your blog and not mine. But I’m begging you, with sugar on top!
Comment by the swede — February 1, 2006 @ 8:37 am
Gaaahrrgrrhhh! *beep* html and *beep*. This is too much for me! I’m going to *beep* when I *beep* and then *beeeeeeeeeeep*!
(sob)
Comment by the swede — February 1, 2006 @ 8:40 am
dang! and i’d been telling everyone it was you.
and maybe it really is. could this be one of those stories allegedly “leaked” by a “source who wishes to remain anonymous” when in fact it’s just a ploy to deflect our attention away from the truth?
Comment by dgm — February 1, 2006 @ 8:57 am
That is some fantastic detective work. As a very powerful and important person in Mr. Six’s life, however, I should warn you that the thugs are on their way…
Comment by sandra — February 1, 2006 @ 9:24 am
we don’t have six flags here, but i’ve seen the commericals, they’re great!
i thought that guy was justin timberlake, dressed up like an old man.
Comment by better safe than sorry — February 1, 2006 @ 9:54 am
And what does this “Danny” have to say about the way he mocked “the elderly” as a way to force parents into taking their little brats to that overrated amusement park? No wonder he wanted to remain hidden. Thank you, Pauly, for being the Woodward and the Bernstein of our generation.
Comment by Neil — February 1, 2006 @ 11:00 am
I will never be the same…
This is worse than hearing that Frey’s utterly unbelievable book of lies, was truly an unbelievable book of lies…
Things like this cause true believers to jump off bridges and make Queen Oprah mad.
Comment by Daigoji Gai — February 1, 2006 @ 12:11 pm
I think you have your story wrong. They got rid of Mr. Six because he was scaring the crap out of young and old alike. As many before me have written, this freak is the scariest thing to hit the screen since the original Alien.
Your fascination with him is a bit disturbing and probably something you should take up with your shrink.
Comment by Quiet American — February 1, 2006 @ 2:11 pm
Quiet American - If you must know, my shrink told me the best way to work through this was to find out who the real man behind the mask was, reveal the truth to the world and then that should supposedly pretty much make me feel good.
Except, I didn’t ask him how long after revealing it I would feel better, and Mr. Six (as of this comment being submitted) still makes me feel uneasy.
Your guess is as good as mine, QA.
Comment by Pauly D — February 1, 2006 @ 2:16 pm
wow, forget the fact that congressional aides are editing wikipedia entries on taxpayer’s time, you sir have cracked the case of the decade.
i expect to see a picture of you with a pulitzer very soon. seriously, i want to know what a pulitzer looks like. i know the look of the grammys, the oscars, the mtv music awards, but i’ve never seen a pulitzer.
Comment by evan — February 1, 2006 @ 5:39 pm
Mr.Six is in fact very scary and strange. That is not why I hate him though, no I hate him becaue that stupid stupid song get’s stuck in my head and I go around humming the 3 bars I know.
~sigh~
Make it stop, make it stop.
Oh and I live in So.Cal so I’m near Six Flags, but you know, I try NOT to go to places that will get me shanked, shot at, or abused in any way shape or form.
They don’t call it family fun for nothing…
Comment by virenda — February 1, 2006 @ 6:01 pm
Unfortunately the immutable laws of physics contradict the whole premise of your account. Allow me to reconstruct this if I may as I’ve heard this story a number of times.
Comment by H.F. Peterman — February 1, 2006 @ 8:12 pm
Dammit, now I have the theme song stuck in my head.
Comment by Carly — February 1, 2006 @ 10:49 pm
My life is just THAT much more complete. Thanks!!!
I thought it was just Freddy Krueger with no hat on…
Comment by Freedom Fighter — February 2, 2006 @ 2:10 am
Damn, I thought he really was an old man and as I reach that age, I would magically cross over whatever age threshold gives you the ability to move like a triple-jointed lizard in a fire-ant bed. My hopes are dashed now and I will probably hate you forever, if I remember anything about all this tomorrow.
Comment by Butch Grant — February 2, 2006 @ 7:19 am
I thought it was him…I have watched Queer Eye for a while to pick up style points…and, I thought I saw a lot of similarities. Thank You for resolving this issue for me (by the way I am gay, as well.)
Comment by Fried Dough — February 2, 2006 @ 8:54 am
i could have sworn he was a real old man.
Comment by moe berg — February 2, 2006 @ 8:57 am
Am I the only person on the face of the Earth who was vaguely amused by those Six Flags commercials?
Yup, I’m going to have a ton of stuff to discuss with my therapist next week.
Comment by Keith — February 2, 2006 @ 9:16 am
good riddance to a creepy character and an obnoxious song…
Comment by brian — February 2, 2006 @ 10:18 am
I always thought it was Uncle Jun from the Soprano’s.
Comment by Emma — February 2, 2006 @ 11:16 am
Damn it all! Now they’re going to have to call the Ranch Tooth out of retirement to be the new Six Flags mascot.
Comment by Sara J. — February 2, 2006 @ 6:17 pm
Keith - No. No you’re not. I thought they were hilarious, especially the first one. But then I also thought it was an actual old guy, so don’t go by me.
Comment by Mark — February 2, 2006 @ 9:24 pm
i thought it was a real old guy, too. i figured it was just computer animation or something.
i wish you were telling us all it was kevin federline or james frey.
Comment by kristine — February 3, 2006 @ 3:52 am
Now that you mention it, I do see the similarity in the eyes and the smile. It also reminds me of something that happened to me last summer.
This past August I broke the frame on my eyeglasses and the day I went to pick up my new pair, I noticed everywhere I went I was getting weird looks of recognition and smiles. Since I had worked in several high profile jobs in the area, I shrugged it off as people I knew but didn’t immediatly recognize. When I got to the store I looked in the fitting mirror and saw it for myself. In order to be able to see when I drove, I had had to put on an older pair of frames and the ones I grabbed were from late 80’s/ early 90’s (read: much larger). Glasses I hadn’t worn since I had had much more hair. And to think I waved back to some of those people!
Comment by Happy Ben — February 3, 2006 @ 7:20 am
Whoa way to much information i didn’t need to know that haha, man that guy freaks me out!
Comment by bob — February 3, 2006 @ 5:05 pm
All I know is that if some old geezer dressed in an outfit like that and looking like he does stopped a bus in front of me, I would either run like hell or kick him where the sun don’t shine.
Comment by Heather — February 3, 2006 @ 9:10 pm
wow. you have way too much time on your hands.
Comment by wow — February 4, 2006 @ 10:54 am
You are wrong
I know for sure who Mr. Six is
I am a friend of his
and you are dead wrong
he is a high school teacher from Indiana and his wife is Mrs. Six
Try again
Comment by Drew — February 7, 2006 @ 7:31 pm
Personally, I absolutely LOVE Mr Six. I thought it was great advertising. So sad that so many people find this creepy. What is wrong with an older gentleman having a great time???? I hope when i am elderly i can still feel so much enthusiasm towards life, instead of sitting at the local church basement playing bingo, and finding the most exciting thing of my week is when at the store i find a bingo marker in a new color!!!!!!!!!! Wow….Mr Six rules!!! Too bad this he not for real.
Comment by Patti — February 8, 2006 @ 9:13 am
Poor Mr. 6 was on a news cast and groped Diane Sawyer as he passed behind her. She sort of jumped up in the air with an astounded rather then pleased look. I’ll bet that is why he was canned. Get it? Canned. PH
Comment by Paul H — February 12, 2006 @ 9:43 pm
We were convinced Paul H was Mr. Six! Rats!
Comment by SEC — February 13, 2006 @ 7:01 am
Nicely done! He’s a nationwide spokesman (not just for Magic Mountain) and he has actually traveled the country in a big Six Flags bus visiting the parks. I almost got to meet him when I volunteered for a community day at Six Flags America, but I was working in the wrong part of the park at the time.
Comment by Meredith — February 16, 2006 @ 8:23 am
I figured he liked little boys not the big ones…
Comment by JT Chandler — September 8, 2006 @ 2:58 pm
the person who plays MR. Six varies…the player changes. It can be Danny Teeson one day or a 14 yr. old African American kid with heavy makeup and dances really well
Comment by Ian — January 29, 2007 @ 11:22 am
poor guy. Now that the “secret’s out” He’ll be known as the creepy dancing 6 flaggs guy…If only he knew what he got him self into…
Comment by Leah — August 4, 2007 @ 2:41 pm