This Post Will Not Be Called ‘Tidbits of Life’

Although isn’t Tidbits of Life a great title for a post?

Sort of reminds me of a song from the soon-to-be-released-musical-as-a-movie Rent. I can just hear the chorus of the song now in my head:

Tidbits of life,
trouble and strife,
the kind we don’t like,
those tidbits of life.

The good and the bad,
that you and me had,
our tidbits, those big fits,
those tidbits of life.

It would be an exhilarating song.

In the world of screenwriting — I have been out and about lately pitching some movie ideas of mine to a variety of companies. You may or may not know what pitching is all about, but in a nutshell, one must sell producers/studios on an entire movie concept (from beginning to end, the whole story) in about 8 minutes. If they like it, they very well may pay you to write it. If they don’t, well, they don’t. There are always stories about executives taking calls or dozing off during particularly bad pitches, but something happened to me yesterday that took the cake. The company head I was pitching to (well known for a hugely successful comedy franchise) happened to have their dog hanging around the office. As I started my pitch the dog jumped up on the couch next to me and decided to take a nap. And about 3 minutes into my pitch, the dog started SNORING so loud that it almost threw me off my game. Yes, the executives were awake, but their dog was snoring through it. What that means for me, well, only time will tell.

In celebrity news, last weekend’s celebrity sightings at the Arclight Cinemas in Hollywood just goes to show you that it is the place to see famous folk on the weekend. There was Tobey Maguire, now looking spry and having shaved off some pounds… There was ER creator John Wells, ordering up a sausage baguette and diet coke… There was SNL‘s Chris Parnell, wandering around aimlessly with a backpack on like a lost afterschool child… There were The O.C.‘s Adam Brody and Rachel Bilson, rushing out as fast as they could to avoid anyone noticing it was them (uh huh, sure)… And there was even Kathy Bates, wearing SOCKS with a pair of shoes that should never be worn with socks. Yes, the Arclight Cinemas in Hollywood – better than any other place on a Saturday night if you want to do some star sighting…

In the world of books, and more specifically The Lost Blogs, I am now in the stage of getting blurbs (quotes) from well known celebs, authors and blogging gurus for the back of the book. The process is always nerve-wracking cause you never know who will be open to reading a 400+ page manuscript and giving you a glowing quote of approval. Really, next to your parents telling you you’re loved, this is the next best thing. In a perfect world we’d get a quote from a well known celeb, an author well-regarded for his sense of humor and a well-respected, widely known blogger. I won’t give away the list of who we’re out to so as to not jinx anything – but I’d be curious to know from the peanut gallery which “names” mean something to you when looking at the back of a humor book. Is there someone whose quote would convince you to buy a book? Who would it be?

And finally, in the world of Tidbits (yes, you can sing the chorus here if you like), I’d just like to let everyone know that I have just wrapped up my intense 30 day “All Water & Cotton Ball Diet.” That is where I drench cotton balls in water then chew on them for breakfast and lunch (no, you don’t swallow them, it just simulates eating) and then a sensible dinner. Usually dinner consists of enough food to fill out a breakfast, a lunch and a dinner — but there are no rules in this diet for that. You eat as much as you want as long as it’s sensible.

Good sense. That, I have.

22 comments on “This Post Will Not Be Called ‘Tidbits of Life’

  1. Snidget - October 19, 2005 at 9:47 am -

    Good luck with the pitch… What kind of dog was it? (besides a stupid one… I mean, hellooo… doesn’t he know the great Paul Davidson was in his company?)

    surely you jest about the cotton ball diet.

  2. nic - October 19, 2005 at 10:14 am -

    It wouldn’t really matter who said what about your book … I’d read it anyway.
    But I guess I would value the opinion of Tracy Ullman or maybe Dennis Miller. Or George Carlin or maybe Bette Midler. Or Jerry Seinfeld. Or Kathy Bates.

  3. Hilary - October 19, 2005 at 10:41 am -

    Well, geez Pauly. If you want me to write a blurb for you, I’ll do it. No need to write an entire post about a “well-respected, widely known blogger.”

    And I can’t wait for RENT to open. Can’t wait!

  4. monkeyinabox - October 19, 2005 at 11:01 am -

    What about Morsels Of The Moment ? Sounds juicy good to me.

  5. Hope - October 19, 2005 at 11:42 am -

    I personally think you SHOULD put a quote from your mom on the book. I would absolutely want to read a book with a blurb from somebody’s mom. Hey, if your own mom doesn’t like you why should anyone else?

  6. meme - October 19, 2005 at 12:33 pm -

    i would totally let you quote me for the back cover as long as you put a really hot picture of me there too. in fact, could you rename the book to “The Lost Blogs…and Meme’s Really Hot”

  7. Amber - October 19, 2005 at 12:37 pm -

    I too think your mom should have a blurb on the back of the book.

    And maybe a blurb from Carl Hiaasen. I love that guy.

  8. Flower Girl - October 19, 2005 at 1:26 pm -

    I was going to give you the name of someone GREAT to provide you with a quote on the back of your book, but that wet cotton bit made me a little queasy…

    Chewing wet cotton…

    Uh…I gotta go…

  9. kingbenny - October 19, 2005 at 1:27 pm -

    It would be Kind-Of-A-Big-Deal to me if you had a blurb from Quagmire of Family Guy on the back.

  10. AJ - October 19, 2005 at 1:41 pm -

    Now I’ve got “Tibits of Life” in my head and I can’t get it out.

  11. jenny - October 19, 2005 at 4:18 pm -

    comedians i dig: chris rock, ellen, will ferrell, mike myers, margaret cho, richard lewis…

    i really really love ellen and if she were on the book, i’d buy it.

  12. jenny - October 19, 2005 at 4:19 pm -

    i really really love ellen and if she were on the book, i’d buy it.

    …well aside from the fact that i’d buy it anyway since YOU wrote it… 🙂

  13. Kathleen - October 19, 2005 at 6:03 pm -

    Ahhh…Tobey Maguire…….

    oh. yea. right.
    um, I like Steve Carrell, Paul Rudd, Will Ferrell, Ben Stiller, David Spade, Craig Ferguson, Greg Kinnear, That new guy on SNL (what a hottie) Bill Hader, John Heder…I can’t think of anymore right now.

  14. Will - October 19, 2005 at 7:25 pm -

    If I saw an approving quote from either Jim Gaffigan or Demitri Martin on the back of a book, I would be prone to buying said book right away. Also, pretty much anyone from The Daily Show. Or Mike Nelson. You’d have a pretty fine amount of credibility if you got a quote from Mike Nelson, and he also seems like the sort of guy who would be rather attainable.

  15. Pauly D - October 19, 2005 at 7:35 pm -

    My mom has agreed, everyone! My MOM has agreed!

  16. Sarah - October 19, 2005 at 10:28 pm -

    Wait a second, isn’t it “exhilArating?”

    WAIT ANOTHER SECOND… aren’t you a WRITER?

  17. Pauly D - October 19, 2005 at 10:35 pm -

    That’s why writers have EDITORS, Sarah.

    We can’t spell.

  18. That Girl - October 20, 2005 at 8:37 am -

    I buy more books than anyone I know and I never read blurbs. I read the back/jacket summary or maybe the first page.

  19. Pauly D - October 20, 2005 at 8:42 am -

    But what if the book came with a year’s supply of cheese? Would that influence how you spend your dollars?

  20. nic - October 20, 2005 at 12:12 pm -

    A Mom-blurb AND cheese!? That book is SO mine!

  21. dziga - November 23, 2005 at 10:41 pm -

    There is a guy in real life whom the character in RENT named “Mark”
    is based on (except he is not gay)–his
    name is Paul Garrin, who among other things is known for breaking the story on the infamous Tompkins Square Park Police
    Riot that took place in 1988 in the East Village, one of the events that inspired
    Jonathan Larson to author his play “RENT”.
    Paul became known as the
    “Man with a Video Camera”, and could be
    seen carrying his video camera with him everywhere,
    often finding himself videotaping the police and the many riots
    that went down in the East Village during the 80’s and early 90’s.
    more about Paul Garrin:
    http://pg.mediafilter.org see his famous clip
    “Man with a Video Camera”
    rtsp://stream.freethe.net/manwcam.mov
    or buy his videotape “By Any Means Necessary”
    which chronicles the housing struggles in the East Village
    between 1988-1991 that inspired the story behind RENT. http://shadowshop.com
    go there and click on “video” (or “tapes).
    You can view a sample clip there, and order the video online.

  22. Mark Spencer - December 25, 2007 at 10:19 pm -

    So glad I found this blog. I’m an aspiring part-time Screenwriter but haven’t had the balls to move to LA and really “go for it” if you will. Hearing these stories is inspirational though.

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