Geena Davis Likes to Cut in Line

Saturday night was an eye opener in more than one way.

First of all, it was revealed that the mighty penguins of the North Pole are some kick ass animals. They do a lot of marching back and forth to the water, to fill their bellies with food, only so that they may march back to where their offspring are at, only so they can regurgitate a milky white substance from their mouth, to their offspring, which in turn allows tiny penguin babies to survive.

The other thing that was revealed to me was that Geena Davis likes to cut in line.

On my way into the Arclight Cinema in Hollywood that night — that’s where I spotted her. Tall, fit, with a happy little attitude exuding forth from her face. Geena Davis. From such classic flicks as Thelma & Louise, Cutthroat Island and, uh, Earth Girls Are Easy. Over the course of the last few decades she has been hooked up with Jeff Goldblum, Renny Harlin and her present husband Reza Jarrahy — and lately her career had started to falter. (Stuart Little 1 & 2, anyone?)

At the Arclight, they have those “validate your parking ticket here” things — you know the kind that people stand in front of for hours after putting their ticket in and removing it…still unsure that the machine has many any sort of concrete validation on their piece of paper? But Arclight also has their helpful desk by the front doors, where staff are more than happy to validate your ticket for you if you are patient enough to wait in line like everyone else.

Not Ms. Davis.

I like to stamp my ticket ahead of time, before the movie, which is why I was waiting in a line of about ten people at the front desk. Of course, Geena Davis, on her way out from seeing a movie — had yet to get her ticket stamped and decided that now was as good a time as any to get it done.

But, uh oh. There was a line.

Had it been the Geena Davis of Earth Girls are Easy, Stuart Little or The Fly, I suspect she would have waited in line just like everyone else. Her credits would not have been impressive enough, or had enough buzz to warrant such an illegal and socially reprehensible act.

But with all the buzz lately for her new ABC show Commander in Chief in which she plays a United States Vice President who becomes President after her boss becomes ill — it’s no wonder that Geena Davis (who is waited on hand and foot as the first female boss of the States) thinks that if she wants her ticket stamped all she’s got to do is step in front of a group of 10 people to make it so.

Had she just come off the mild success of Earth Girls Are Easy she wouldn’t have dared. Had she just booked the role of “Mother” in Stuart Little 2 she probably would have asked all ten of us if WE wanted HER to get our tickets stamped for US. Had she just gotten the gig as a half-man, half-fly’s girlfriend — she probably wouldn’t even be out in public.

But alas, lately — she’s been treated like royalty.

On her new show, which she is most likely working on every day of the week, she is catered to and complimented… She is treated as the most powerful person in the World. In her mind, the fate of the World rests in her hands, so why not too, should a parking lot validation stamp?

That’s why I forgive her for what she did — simply ignoring me and the nine others standing and waiting for our stamp. That’s why I forgive her for not even turning to look at her fellow men even after some older clientele made HUFFING and SIGHING sounds to alert her to the injustice she was currently a part of. If there’s any one reason to overlook such a social faux paus, it’s this:

Geena Davis is the President of the United States.

Hell, she can cut in line whenever… she… wants.

39 comments on “Geena Davis Likes to Cut in Line

  1. kristine - August 15, 2005 at 8:13 am -

    oh, com ON! you mean you didn’t say a damn thing?! what’s happening to you, PAUL!? is it because she is bigger than you?

  2. Pauly D - August 15, 2005 at 8:15 am -

    Honestly, Kristine — she scares me. She’s SO tall. She could totally kick my ass.

  3. kristine - August 15, 2005 at 8:16 am -

    i knew it.

    sissy.

  4. Hilary - August 15, 2005 at 8:22 am -

    Ya know, sometimes they split that line by the door into two lines–one for parking validation only and one for whatever it is the rest of those people are waiting in line for. Maybe she thought they were going to split it? Or is that stretching it…

  5. justin - August 15, 2005 at 8:57 am -

    What a cheapass!! She validated?? And she didn’t even have a personal assistant to do it for her?? What a LOSER!!!

    But I agree. She’s totally scary. She can probably dunk.

  6. jenny - August 15, 2005 at 9:05 am -

    i cannot believe you didn’t say anything. NO ONE gets to cut in line…sheesh who does she think she is! and now i’m thinking, who chose her for that TV role? i don’t get her appeal AT ALL. i can’t get past her mouth.

  7. groovebunny - August 15, 2005 at 9:09 am -

    The Arclight is a beautiful theatre! But as for Geena Davis, all my respect for her went out the window when she did Stuart Little I and II. Plus she’s always kinda reminded me of a huge beaver. Yeah I would have let her cut in front of me too Pauly. She’s huge plus I’d be afraid she’d gnaw me to death with her two huge front teeth.

  8. Keith - August 15, 2005 at 9:10 am -

    I kind of wish you hadn’t said anything about this… now my monster years-long crush on Geena Davis is diminished by the fact that she can be rude in realtime.

    Then again, I’m also pissed that I was at the Arclight on Friday night and Sunday night, and the one night of the weekend that I’m not there, Geena shows up.

  9. Amy Steier - August 15, 2005 at 9:32 am -

    You should’ve said something to her. I would’ve loved to read what you wrote about that.

  10. ms. sizzle - August 15, 2005 at 9:33 am -

    oh thelma! you are such a disappointment. i would have had trouble saying something too. she’s too tall with too big of a mouth.

    those penguins sure are hardy aren’t they? little troopers. 🙂

  11. jenny - August 15, 2005 at 10:43 am -

    OH i forgot to mention the penguins. YES they are little troopers, aren’t they sizzle? wait was geena seeing the penguins? you’d think she’d have a little common courtesy after watching all them wait and wait for months… a few minutes of waiting for ticket validation is nothing like 9 months!

  12. Geena Davis - August 15, 2005 at 10:45 am -

    Pirates don’t wait in line. Arrrrr!

  13. monkeyinabox - August 15, 2005 at 10:47 am -

    Yeah, Pauly you better respect those who are vertically enhanced.

  14. Christa - August 15, 2005 at 11:44 am -

    So just to clarify, she was at the movies by herself? Am I to assume Geena Davis was dateless in LA?

  15. Pauly D - August 15, 2005 at 11:50 am -

    No, not alone. With her husband, and another couple. Yet she was the one getting the validation.

  16. Will - August 15, 2005 at 12:17 pm -

    Maybe she’s a gentle giant, Paul, the kind who wouldn’t even want to kick your ass even though she could.

    But that said, cutting in line is really not cool.

  17. Amber - August 15, 2005 at 12:20 pm -

    So let me get this straight — she has her own t.v. show, and a couple of decent movies under her belt, plus the fact that she’s sorta pretty in a amazonian way, and yet she’s “in line” getting the validation? Uh, Renny? Yeah, I think that the guy whose, um, illustrious directing career includes “Ford Fairlane” and “Deep Blue Sea” should be careful about what he makes the woman who is clearly the breadwinner in the family do for him. Although I do have a sad love for “Deep Blue Sea,” mostly because of the part where Samuel L. Jackson is giving this big speech about sticking together and the shark jumps up and eats him. I’m sorry, it’s funny.

    Wait, what were we talking about?

  18. Amber - August 15, 2005 at 12:30 pm -

    Oh and also? When I said all that stuff about Renny Harlin, apparently I forgot in between reading and commenting that they’re not together anymore. I think “Cutthroat Island” was the death of THAT relationship, though it could have been because he always made her validate the parking. In which case, this new guy should tread lightly.

  19. cat - August 15, 2005 at 12:31 pm -

    hmm.. every so often i think “maybe i should move to hollywood” and then stories like this remind me that i would just have to put up with celebs cutting into line and getting into places before me. i don’t put up with that here and i might get banned from hollywood from smacking a celeb. heh

  20. Scrivs - August 15, 2005 at 1:22 pm -

    That shit wouldn’t fly in Tampa…

  21. Esther - August 15, 2005 at 1:45 pm -

    Perhaps she was in character, trying to figure out how a VP-turned-first-woman-president might cope with an outing to the movies. Validating parking is clearly a symbol of the old civilian’s life she left behind, a break with a past that she views as integral to the woman she’s become. Isn’t it?

  22. Peter - August 15, 2005 at 2:38 pm -

    Uh, for the record, there are no penguins at the North Pole, or even in the Arctic, for that matter. They aren’t actually at the South pole, either: too damn cold + no fish. (Although you might see a Tux or two on the laptops of the scientists.)

  23. Neil - August 15, 2005 at 2:41 pm -

    Let’s continue ragging on her — just because it’s fun. I once saw her eating at Canter’s Deli and she didn’t leave a tip.

  24. Pauly D - August 15, 2005 at 3:09 pm -

    Peter – if there are no penquins at the North Pole or the Arctic or the South Pole, then where the hell are all these penguins at?

    Seriously.

  25. jenny - August 15, 2005 at 3:49 pm -

    “…only two species live on the Antarctic continent (the Adelie and the Emperor). The other species range in habitat from the islands near the Antarctic circle, to the shores of South America, South Africa, Australia, New Zealand, and the Galapagos Islands…” courtesy of:
    http://www.eliasdesigns.com/penguins/index.htm

  26. Kiki - August 15, 2005 at 5:22 pm -

    I can’t believe someone else remembers Earth Girls Are Easy!! I embarassingly admit that I used to like that movie.

  27. heather - August 15, 2005 at 6:45 pm -

    she is frightening. i’m glad you didn’t get into a fight with her, because she totally would have ripped every appendage from your body.

    or not. who knows.

    i like how you used this whole GD thing to divert our attention from the fact you spent two hours watching penguins walking, narrated by our boy Morgan. nice job.

  28. Edgy Mama - August 15, 2005 at 7:28 pm -

    Someone should sic a penguin on her.

  29. Becky - August 15, 2005 at 8:21 pm -

    If she was going to cut, you guys should’ve demanded she scream out Beetlegeuse, Beetlegeuse, Beetlegeuse.

  30. danielle - August 15, 2005 at 9:23 pm -

    Kiki, no need to be embarrassed. I admit it… my Earth Girls Are Easy video tape moved with me across the country, and back again. But then again, I am from Jersey.

  31. purpletwinkie - August 15, 2005 at 10:03 pm -

    I heard George W. Bush cuts in line too (you know, just a rumor). I’m sure she was just doing research for the role.

  32. :: jozjozjoz :: - August 15, 2005 at 11:34 pm -

    March of the Penguins was way awesome.

    I love when they decide to travel by belly, but almost cried when those penguins dropped their eggs in the transfer.

  33. The Moviequill - August 16, 2005 at 6:26 am -

    if the show gets picked up and not cancelled she’ll have three SS Officers (that’s Secret Service) brow beat you to step back and let her though to validate

  34. nic - August 16, 2005 at 6:58 am -

    If you hadn’t forgotten your tazer gun, this story would’ve had an ending.
    Next time.

  35. Alex Blagg - August 16, 2005 at 5:10 pm -

    i saw her once on the Promenade in Santa Monica. she was having a rocky road ice cream cone. she gave me a dirty look as i passed.

  36. Lauren - August 18, 2005 at 5:31 pm -

    I’ve always thought of Geena Davis as the poor man’s version of Julia Roberts. Hope that’s not too rude. I’d love to be a poor man’s version of someone else.

    Also, once on TV I saw a penguin that lived in the tropics and walked to the fish store with a little backpack to pick up the fish for him and his human family.

    I want to marry a penguin when I grow up.

  37. gwyon - August 28, 2005 at 7:46 am -

    Oh, come on. Julia Roberts wishes she were the poor man’s Geena Davis. The latter made the Olympic archery semi-finals and is a Mensan. The former is tall, period. As far as I can tell, her one accomplishment was shedding her Southern accent, and everybody who moves to LA does that first thing.

  38. Steve - August 30, 2005 at 6:57 pm -

    Who the hell greenlit (greenlighted?) that show? I can’t be alone in knowing that its days are numbered and it hasn’t even started yet.

  39. Julie - July 29, 2006 at 10:19 am -

    why dont you buzzz off. Ever since Geena Davis showed men that a woman could run the big house, every man has some stupid thing to say about her. whats wrong, is she too much of a threat to your dumb ego?

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