filÂ·iÂ·busÂ·ter n. The use of obstructionist tactics, especially prolonged speechmaking, for the purpose of delaying legislative action. An instance of the use of this delaying tactic.
Usage: The Congressman from New York, hoping to delay the passing of an abhorrent piece of legistature, filibustered for over 12 hours, discussing the issue at hand, along with other subjects unrelated to the current proposed law.
It seems, Congress is using my words as their filibuster.
In just the last five days, WFME has received over 150 unique visits from Congress (house.gov) and there is only one obvious reason why. Currently, there must be some kind of legislature that our representatives do not want to see get passed. But there’s a problem, because they just don’t have the votes necessary to strike it down. What can they do? What is their way out?
Words For My Enjoyment.
While you may not know that the longest filibuster has been clocked in at about 24 hours and 18 minutes (by Strom Thurman in 1957), what you may know is that any Congressman can stand up in front of Congress and talk for as long as he wants, about whatever he wants — many times motivated by getting a little extra time before voting on new legislature. And the recent hits to WFME means one very exciting thing.
My words are being used to shape the course of this country’s lawmaking process.
In thinking about that, it got me wondering just which words our beloved Congressmen and women would be reading to pass the time. Would they be talking about the state of weapons in the world, referencing my words on how rubberbands could be the new bullet? Or perhaps, switching to foreign relations, would they be reading my words on war with Canada? Or, perhaps, just looking to liven up the whole floor of Congress, would our dedicated lawmakers decide instead to discuss how elevators are stinky germ receptacles?
Either way, Congress is talking about these words and it’s a pretty exciting moment for me.
For someone who has always wanted their opportunity to speak their mind in such a historical forum, I have often thought about running for local office. Perhaps mayor. Or neighborhood watch foreman? Know that I have never really put much thought into such things, but I’ve dreamed about it happening. About how it would all play out. The horrible election smear campaigns and such. Well, no longer. Now that my words are being uttered throughout the hallowed halls of the 109th Congress, I can sleep soundly knowing that our leaders are guffawing as they hear about how I can convince you that chicken strips are better than fish sticks.
God, you so know that those Congressmen and women are having the TIME. OF. THEIR. LIVES.
But there is a dark side.
What if, for example, said referenced filibustering Congressperson (easier to say this than man and women and it takes up far less text although this parenthetical explanation has messed up that whole concept) reads absolutely everything in my archives? What if they’re reading some of my boring posts? What if the Congresspeople start e-mailing other people in D.C. and telling them that they “are so bored with this WFME filibuster”?
What then becomes of me?
You know how people may be talking about you behind your back but you don’t know it and you’re no worse off because of it? And do you know how, as soon as you know people are talking about you behind your back you just can’t get settled? Because you don’t know what people are saying about you?
That’s the “Congress is using WFME as a filibuster” double-edged sword.
If only I knew what was really going on. If only I knew if Congress was enjoying my words. If only I knew who, from Congress, is accessing my words again and again and again.
Maybe if they’d show themselves… Just maybe… Maybe we’d have another Deep Throat revelation on our hands. Just maybe.
Then again, maybe not.