Audio on Paper

I know my best and this just ain’t it.

But this audio clip of me talking to today’s phone solicitor from the Los Angeles Times is pretty amusing if for only one reason: the deep sigh of death that the solicitor lets loose when he realizes that this is going to be just another one “of those days.”

For that, it’s worth listening to.

17 comments on “Audio on Paper

  1. kristine - July 20, 2005 at 3:05 pm -


    do you record all of your phonecalls, creepy mccreeperson?

  2. Pauly D - July 20, 2005 at 3:07 pm -

    Not at all.

    Just the ones from the solicitors, the family, the acquaintances, the gardener, the cleaning service, the video store and the wrong numbers.

  3. JM - July 20, 2005 at 4:56 pm -


    And, now that I have confirmed that you have audio capability…

  4. Kathleen - July 20, 2005 at 5:23 pm -

    i wish i could record myself laughing and just post that as my comment

  5. Eric - July 20, 2005 at 5:48 pm -

    That’s too freakin’ hilarious! When I first read the article I must have missed the “phone” part – I thought it was a solicitor – as in lawyer!

    I actually did that job for a grand total of 1 night when I was absolutely desperate for money. Not proud of it, but when I was done I figured that I’d rather starve in the freezing cold Toronto streets than do that job again.

    Too funny, man, too funny!

  6. groovebunny - July 20, 2005 at 6:23 pm -

    LOL that sigh was too funny! And was he trying to insinuate the crap on your fingers was from your keyboard and not the paper?

  7. Will - July 20, 2005 at 7:41 pm -

    Lately I’ve been trying to apply the voice on these recordings to how I hear your writing in my head, but it just hasn’t been working. However, your voice did not distract me from the fact that this is another darn funny clip. Nice work.

  8. kiddo - July 20, 2005 at 9:00 pm -

    oh god. you know i found this funny at all, but i’m actually just about to start working for rogers communications as an outbound sales rep, so i’m deadly afraid of ppl like you. oh well, i’m pretty sure i’ll be quiting after a few weeks anyway. still hilarious. did you end up getting rid of your subscription?

  9. Hilary - July 20, 2005 at 10:50 pm -

    Haha, that was great! You can tell this guy doesn’t like his job.

  10. Kai - July 21, 2005 at 3:15 am -

    You lulled him into a false sense of security with your cheerful greeting them smashed him down. Perfect! A lesson for us all.

  11. xta - July 21, 2005 at 7:13 am -

    it TOTALLY sounded like he was eating.
    perhaps it was a twinkie.

  12. Dave - July 21, 2005 at 7:57 am -

    Good stuff. It reminds of the Seinfeld episode where Jerry asks the telemarketer if he can call him back and asks for his phone number.

    Telemarketer: We don’t do that.
    Jerry: I guess you don’t want people calling you at home.
    Tele: Umm, no.
    Jerry: Well now you know how I feel. Click

  13. sarah - July 21, 2005 at 12:37 pm -

    i seriously love messing with telemarketers.. i get a sick satisfaction out of it because they always call my house at the worst possible time.

  14. MHALS - July 21, 2005 at 3:09 pm -

    I dont think it sounded like he was eating, but it’s still very funny. How do you do this? I want to do this? How do you record your phone calls?

  15. Schultzy - July 21, 2005 at 4:23 pm -

    Like MHALS I want to know, It could spark some seriously funny calls with sales men.

  16. nic - July 22, 2005 at 5:20 am -

    I telemarketed for about 10 minutes once. Home Improvement for new home owners. My first call was to a woman whose dad had just passed away (that’s how she got the house) We were talking about her dad the whole time, and family and love and stuff. My boss was listening in and decided I wasn’t cut out for the job. I asked him for ten bucks and went home.

  17. Helena - July 22, 2005 at 8:50 pm -

    “Nope. My hands are clean.”

    Not of filthy lies, they aren’t! How can he deny that newsprint rubs off on your fingers? It is like he is rewriting the laws of physics to sell you a subscription.


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