Words, California-Style (Or, Airplane Mold)
June 18th, 2005
It’s good to be back in Cali.
Much like Conan feels when he comes back from a week broadcasting in Vegas, or much like The Today Show after a week on the French Riveria, I can finally feel their pain. There is fatigue and lunacy and a bit of the “I feel like the food I ate on the plane” disease.
I’d like to share a harrowing experience which I had on an American Airlines flight today from Boston’s Logan Airport to the San Francisco Airport. (Yes, American Airlines is also the sponsor of that wonderful American Airlines Ticket Challenge Program.) Since they no longer serve food on planes (yes, it’s simply ludicrous) — they at least are caring enough to charge you three bucks for a box of crap, er, snacks.
What do you get for three bucks?
Well, you get a package of two stale Oreo cookies, two packages of saltines with two crackers in each package (which I ate in less than a minute), a package of Craisins, and two tin-foil wedges of stale/moldy cheese that looked a lot like a sliver of Play-Doh which I put in a time capsule in the year 1977 and just opened today, on my American Airlines flight.
Pah-tooie.
Oh, and there were some Tostidos in there also. I don’t know about you, but aren’t Tostidos the poor-man’s Dorito? I mean, look at the name? Look at the similarities:
TO-S-TIDOS
DO-R-ITOS
I think we know what someone’s trying to pull over our eyes.
Nonetheless, the airline experience is getting worse and worse as time goes by and I half expect to be sitting on bean bags in the near future. In the meantime, however, WFME is back on its favorite coast and ready to rock n’ roll with the upcoming week.
—
In the category of shameless promotion this week, my pieces in the new Wired Magazine about Michael Bay’s new movie The Island hits stands, along with another ten-pager in the new mental_floss magazine. On top of that, great developments acomin’ in regards to some movie and book news.
Have a great weekend!
You should have flown jetBlue. They rule!!
Comment by Zach — June 19, 2005 @ 6:31 am
“I think we know what someone’s trying to pull over our eyes.” Is it sunglasses? I hope it’s sunglasses.
Anyway, personally I’ve never set foot on an airplane, not once in my still relatively short life. Apparently I’m not missing out on anything amazing.
Comment by Will — June 19, 2005 @ 11:11 am
You didn’t get the mini salami log in your AA snack pack? You sir, were seriously jipped! Luckily I was able to barter my salami log with my next door seat neighbor for an apple.
And congrats on the new developments! I can’t wait to read about em!!!
Comment by groovebunny — June 19, 2005 @ 9:24 pm
There’s nothing wrong with a little shameless promotion. I’ll be sure to take a look at both publications when they hit the stand! …nothing long with me reading all the magaizines at Barnes and Noble for free either!
Comment by Jim — June 19, 2005 @ 9:54 pm
You know, I packed my boy homemade pasta, some veggies and fruit, peanuts, chips, gum and a snapple for his plane ride on Saturday on to CA…don’t you wish I was your mamma?
Comment by Meagan — June 20, 2005 @ 1:42 pm