Not to be confused with Raising Arizona.
I have had three people raise their eyebrows at me lately, which has communicated three things to me.
1. They have not had botox injections, or else they would have no ability to express any kind of eyebrow raising emotional reactions.
2. They are either excited, concerned or interested in something I am doing.
3. They are confident that they have plucked all stray eyebrow hairs from their brow.
The traditions keep coming. First, there was the weekly Friday ritual of Words For Your Enjoyment. Then there was the Look in the Mirror and Brush Your Teeth poetry reading, which unfortunately never made it to the blog for reasons I’d rather not discuss.
But now, yet another tradition eeks its way out of my head. It is the (drum roll please)…
End o’ The Month Elephant Ending!
I am feeling extremely sad these days for American Idol rejectee, William Hung.
A quick recap for those living in Antarctica:
William Hung was one of those “really bad auditions” on this seasons American Idol. He sang the song “She-Bangs” and was this awkward looking Asian kid who had a tad bit of trouble enunciating. He will go down in American Idol history (if there was such a thing as history based on a very mediocre re-creation of the television show Star Search but with mean-spirited judges) as the kid who stood up to the judges and said something to the effect of:
“I did my best, and that’s all that matters.”
I walk around Los Angeles in a huge neoprene bubble, so it’s obvious I’m not a huge fan of people who share already-chewed, soft and stringy GUM.
I always seem to have such luck when I’m walking (or rolling) down the street here in Los Angeles, finding myself behind a couple, arm in arm, walking in unison. There is such love in the air. And what better way to share such love by, oh I don’t know — removing a covered-in-saliva chewy mass from within your warm, oily mouth and giving it to your soulmate to stick in theirs.
Some crafty spray-painting fans of the site thought that the above picture would sway my decision in awarding first-edition signed copies of Consumer Joe to the 500th, 501st and 502nd commentators… But I look down on vandalism. So…
I can now announce our winners!
The 500th comment goes to Jeff B.
The 501st comment goes to C(h)ristine.
The 502nd comment goes to Robbie.
Congratulations! May this make everything in your life that sucks, a whole lot better.